


For Charity

by EmeraldsAndAmethyst



Category: Ultimate Spider-Man (Cartoon 2012)
Genre: Crack Treated Seriously, Fluff, M/M, Mentioned Peter Parker/Mary Jane Watson
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-14
Updated: 2018-05-08
Packaged: 2019-03-04 14:25:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 6,930
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13366602
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EmeraldsAndAmethyst/pseuds/EmeraldsAndAmethyst
Summary: Apparently Peter's competitive streak regarding The Avengers vs SHIELD Superteams extended to racey charity calendars. Sam wondered if this meant he should thank or punch Tony Stark for starting all of this.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> y'all thought I died but whoops here's a spideynova multichapter fic noone was even expecting

It all started when The Avengers released a saucy calendar for a charity. 

 

Sam had been away from Earth on Nova business. Which did nothing to alleviate Sam's confusion when Spider-Man wandered up to him on the ceiling in the re-re-re-re-rebuilt Triskelion. He didn't even look at him when he greeted him with, “Nova, I need your body. Preferably glowy but without the suit, you can do that? Don't answer I know you can do that, okay, we're meeting the old team and most of the Web Warriors at the one shield warehouse where we had the thing with the evil beekeepers that one time because the one jerk said something jerkbaggy on the radio.”

 

“Webs what…” Sam said blinking in confusion.

 

“Danny and Luke will be so pleased we didn't think you’d be back in time.

 

“In time for-”

 

“Gonna be around” Peter tapped away at his instructor’s tablet “thirteen hundred when we start,  probably last a while, they'll be breaks and food though. So don't worry about that.”

 

“Worry about  _ what _ , exactly?“

 

“Exactly! “ Peter said looking up at him for the first time since his return from space. Sam could practically feel his happy expression through the mask. “Great talk Nova! See you there! “

 

Which left Sam staring after the still muttering Spider-Man. Wondering how his life had come to having his stick in the mud Earth team leader quite possibly inviting him to a superhero orgy. 


	2. Chapter 2

Sam showed up despite his misgivings. After all, it was probably a mission. And if not, he had all kinds of extra fun surprises hidden away in his suit’s effectively infinite pockets.

 

Luke and Danny were there and only too happy to thank Sam for ‘taking one for the team’ so they could both do the same month. And so Sam learned it was a calendar shoot. It was only a little bit disappointing.

 

While it may not have been super sexy, it was fun. Posing nearly naked for the camera, showing off his totally rockin’ bod. Well okay, maybe due to security concerns the photographer was Peter. Who knew Peter Parker was good with a camera?

 

And maybe he was having a little bit too much fun showing off for Pete. Not like Sam could be blamed for how much a prude Peter was. It was Peter’s idea to do this anyways! Whatever, he was a nerd, it was adorable. Sam was having fun playing one of his favorite games which he liked to call ‘make the nerd blush’.

 

It was admittedly way easier when he was wearing _just_ his helmet.

 

And just when Peter would stop blushing and start focusing on boring shit like lighting or whatever, Sam would say something that could be completely innocent but definitely wasn’t. Peter’s ears were basically permanently red, and whenever his blush would fade from his neck or face Sam would needle him again.

 

Sam was lazily flowing through his morning yoga routine. Naked. In his helmet. Floating in the glow of his Nova Force. The click of Peter’s camera was way hotter than it should be. Considering Peter was probably gonna be the only one going through the pics to find a good one. But then, _Peter_ was going to be going through the pics. It was a conundrum.

 

Sam really hoped he did pick a good one and not one of him looking like an idiot.

 

After Sam finished his routine, Peter started telling him how to pose. Huh, kinda weird for him to be so... considerate? Maybe? on letting him finish up. Not that Sam hadn’t already done his yoga once this cycle, so he was mostly doing it to show off. For the presumed audience of the calendars and sadly not Peter. Kinda hard to show off your pathetic human flexibility to a literal spider man.

 

Now that Peter was directing his poses he seemed to be ‘in the zone’, oblivious to Sam’s teasing. It was a bit disappointing that his game of ‘make the nerd blush’ was over so soon, but. Well. There was something ridiculously hot about Peter casually hopping around the set and posing him just so. His hands were sure, gentle, firm.

 

Sam had been half hard through his yoga routine, but there wasn’t anything half about his dick _now_.

 

It was just _flarking_ tragic that Peter didn’t even seem to notice.

 

Typical.


	3. Chapter 3

Sam learned from chatting with his old teammates about The Avengers charity calendar. Ah. That made a lot more sense. Peter  _ was  _ ridiculously competitive, it was part of what made hanging out with him fun. 

 

Sam was kind of impressed that Peter had apparently convinced Ava to do a set. Danny and Luke were doing the same month, only on the condition they could have Heroes for Hire logos on their month.  Also Luke’s baby mom was there, with their way too adorable baby. 

 

Jessica was fun to talk shit with, turns out she was here to make sure Luke didn’t do any ‘volunteer work’. Well, a family had to eat, Sam didn’t worry about the mercenary-esque aspect of their Heroes for Hire thing. Not like Peter did. Peter had only grudgingly accepted their conditions.

 

Sam had trouble keeping their current status straight, Danny had apparently had his assets frozen and Rand Industries was under investigation for working with HYDRA. It sounded crappy but Danny and Luke didn’t seem worried. Jessica was definitely less than pleased.

 

Little Danielle was too sweet. Sam loved kids, was reminded a bit painfully of why he wouldn’t have any by chatting with Jessica. From what she was willing to say about her stint as a super, she’d been through even worse shit than Sam had been through. He wasn’t going to leave a partner with his kids behind. His kids never knowing if their dad would ever return from his job or not. He still had no idea what had happened to his own father.

 

Still, if his friends were gonna have kids he’d be happy to be the awesome uncle. 

 

When Peter got to with his own session he had MJ help him. He guessed with the camera? MJ was pretty amazing and while Peter was a pretty okay super hero (Sam knew he was actually amazing too, but still, couldn’t let him get a big head), Sam figured he probably couldn’t take good pictures of himself at the same time.

 

There was one final shoot, a group shot of all of them. Peter was wearing Spider-Man panties. Sam called him out on this, mostly because holy fuck that was hot and totally unfair why is no one else having  _ problems  _ with this. Peter insisted that they were briefs, not panties. Whatever. Call a spade a pitch all you want Pete, Sam knew panties when he saw them.

 

The group photoset was in the main area, with some quick, super strength assisted rearranging of things it managed to look like a passable NY rooftop. 

 

Jessica stayed out of the shots, but was not at all shy in her comments. Both on their bodies and on their collective stupidity for encouraging Luke to be a hero. She seemed to be the kind of person that enjoyed insulting people so Sam didn’t take it to heart. He blew an overdramatic kiss her way when she started razzing him. Jessica rolled her eyes while Danielle, held on her mom’s hip, clapped and giggled. 

 

Sam was momentarily distracted from posing sexily by making silly faces at the baby. He was bored already, okay? Yeah, his friends were unfairly hot, but it wasn’t like they were going to do anything except stand around looking pretty. 

 

“Nova! Stop ruining the pics and look sexy, Buckethead!” Peter snapped when he realized Sam had gotten a bit off track. He’d rigged up some automatic cameras so there were at least a dozen pics of the old ‘Team Classic’ and adult members of ‘Team Web  Assholes Warriors’ posing dutifully ‘sexily’ and Nova making ridiculous faces.

 

“Whaaaaat, it’s not like you don’t have a hundred pics already Webs. And you promised me catering. Where’s my sandwiches, Pete! I’m staaaaarving. Do you know how many calories I burn doing this without my vac suit?” Sam made sure to sound as obnoxious as possible as he whined. 

 

This started up a bit of a ruckus as apparently Peter had completely forgotten to order food for the rough dozen supers that were helping him out with this charity calendar project. Ben, the surly sort of clone but also not that Sam had completely forgiven for endangering Aunt May (Sam had not and would never forgive him for nearly getting his pseudo-family killed and made a point to let him know at every opportunity, but only if Peter wasn’t around), Peter’s sort of but not really second in command hadn’t been told so he hadn’t taken care of Peter’s tendency to forget things like this. 

 

The shoot pretty much fell apart after that. But Sam  _ did _ get some free sandwiches out of it. Score.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> rating change because i'm trash

There was a final photo op, this time of the usual safe for work sort by a Bugle photographer, when the calendars had finished print and were ready for sale. Sam had laughed with the rest of his team as they’d gotten their calendars. ‘Hah, yes, look at these pics of ourselves naked hahaha.’ He had intended to at least look at it and make sure his picture wasn’t stupid, but then he’d tossed it in a pile of papers on his kitchen bar counter and forgotten about it. Busy, busy, busy with well, life. Being a superhero, a superhero teacher, and a space cop didn’t leave him a lot of free time.

 

A few weeks later he found it again cleaning his apartment in a rush just before Mom and Kae came by for a visit. Spirits he did not need  _ that _ left out laying around. He shoved it in  his  _ absolutely do not open this drawer under any circumstances I am so flarking serious Kae this is not even a joke don’t do it _ drawer. No need to traumatize his baby sister. Not so baby anymore, but still. She complained loudly at him enough over her friends gushing about ‘that hottie Nova’. There was only so many times she could claim a grudge over his destruction of a beloved skate park over a decade ago before it just got weird.

 

He forgot about the calendar right up until the next time he had time for more than just jerking it. He ran back into it getting out supplies for sexy fun solo time. He stared at it, already naked, favorite videos waiting to play on his phone. Videos that may or may not have featured some enthusiastic amateurs in a certain red and blue costume… 

 

_ Eh, fuck it _ . He thought to himself. 

 

After all what was the difference to jerking it to guys pretending to be Spider-Man than to the real deal? Like, Peter  _ had  _ to  _ know  _ people were jerking to him all over the country, and likely even the planet. 

 

So he ripped off the shrink wrap (carefully darkened to hide the more risque bits on the cover) and flipped to August. 

 

“Fuck,” he hissed. 

 

He hadn’t seen Peter’s photoshoot of course. He’d assumed Peter had been in those ridiculous spider-man briefs (cough panties) like for the group photo session they’d done. 

 

He was  _ not _ . 

 

Peter was wearing his mask, his webshooters and  _ fishnet _ . Perched on his spider-cycle in a way that highlighted his amazing ass while hiding his goods. Sam idly noted the fishnet was actually ‘webnet’, which probably meant it was MJs doingt. Getting Peter to show  _ that  _ much skin  _ had  _ to have been MJ. He should thank her, maybe take her out for coffee or something. Because fuck did Peter look  _ good _ . His calves, chest and forearms covered in black  _ lingerie  _ while he sat j _ ust so _ . 

 

His phone lay forgotten on his bed beside him, drawer still open.

 

He knew, realistically, Peter must have been dying of embarrassment during the shoot. Probably had to photoshop out his blush, because he got so damn  _ red _ . But that really didn’t  _ matter _ . He could see, in his imagination, Peter pulling his mask off, his eyes sparkling with lust. Sitting on his Spider-Cycle in only his webshooters, or maybe not even that. 

 

“Buckethead, what took you so long?” he’d say. Sam wasn’t even that surprised to find he’d started teasing himself already. Ah, this was not going to go as planned at all. This was going to be fast.

 

“Oh you know, had to hack the system for privacy,” he’d reply back, landing and pulling his helmet off. Peter would pout at his street clothes. Maybe stretch and twist a bit to show off his cock. Hard and pretty.

 

Sam would walk up to him, run his fingers along his length. Feel that impossible heat that his whole body seemed to radiate. Peter would gasp at his touch.

 

“You're way overdressed, Sparky,” Peter would say. His hands would run over Sam's shirts, his belt. He’d tease his long nimble fingers in between his pants and skin.

 

“Mmm, whatcha gonna do about it?” He’d tease back.

 

But as much as he'd love Pete to suck him off… his ass was so fucking perfect. Sam licked his lips, imagining Peter telling him how much he wanted him. Peter bending over his bike, ass on display. Sam wanted to  _ eat  _ him, lick and suck and tongue fuck him until he was begging and pleading to get fucked.

 

“Sam please! Please! Fuck oh fuck Sam!” He’d wail, ass gaping and ready. Sam would lube him up, all slick and wet. Fuck him hard, give it to him until he was a shaking wreck from pleasure. He’d cum from it, his cock trapped between his body and his bike. The fierce fucking from Sam giving his cock sweet friction. Ah fuck, Pete’d cum all  _ over  _ his precious bike.

 

“Ah!” Sam gasped as he came, pleasure and release driving through him. Finished, he sprawled there on his bed panting and staring at his ceiling. 

 

He’d just jerked it thinking about his  _ friend _ . And if that wasn’t shameful enough, he’d  _ cum _ while thinking of making Peter ‘ruin’ his Spider-Cycle. Peter loved that stupid bike. Was always using it every chance he got. It made their races faster, but less acrobatic. Easier really for Sam, as maneuvering around his weblines was good practice for serious situations he could run into out in space.

 

He closed his eyes, groaning, “I am. The worst. Friend. Ever.”

 

He resolved to absolutely never jerk it to Peter’s fine body again. Especially  _ not  _ while thinking about fucking him over the spider-cycle.


	5. Chapter 5

So of course his resolution only lasted until MJ asked him to read over next month’s calendar story early. She’d been asking him to do that before so it wasn’t  _ that  _ weird. But he’d either conveniently blocked from his mind, or forgotten that Spider-Man was the pin up for August.

 

She really didn’t want to do the whole superhero gig, much to Peter’s disappointment, but she was a hell of a reporter. She was trying to keep donations to the charity up by posting what she called a fluff piece each month. Where basically she interviewed the super or supers of the month by asking stuff like “What’s your favorite color?” or “Do you have any pets?” then put up a few bonus relatively safe for work pics from that super’s shoot with the article.

 

He stopped by MJ’s and nearly died when she’d opened the folder for August. The folder preview images were enough for him to think  _ oh shit _ before being hit with images of Peter in various states of basically fucking naked to sexy lingerie to the cute little spider-man ‘totally not panties’ he’d worn for the group shot. There were way more pictures of Peter than of anyone else, from all different angles. Which probably meant MJ hadn’t been taking the pics, Pete must have set up something to take the pics automatically.

 

And nothing could have prepared Sam for the sheer amazing hotness of Peter in that fucking web netting fishnet bullshit flaunting his perfect ass all over his stupid fucking red and blue motorcycle. Or the way his hard cock was on display so brazenly.

 

“It’s not even a good motorcycle,” Sam said, protesting his own desires. It wasn’t streamlined or sleek, and it’s stupid jets were bulky and awkward.

 

“I dunno, Spidey makes it work,” MJ said. And if Sam’s brain wasn’t crashing straight down into his dick he’d have noticed she was definitely teasing him.

 

“These are good,” he managed to get out, vaguely aware some response other than ogling was called for.

 

“All of them?” Mary Jane teased. Sam gave himself a little shake and willed his blood back up to his brain.

 

“Uh, the bike is ugly as fuck,” Sam said. It kind of was, but it was also a well maintained work of top of the line tech and mechanical genius and he knew it. He didn’t particularly care about the nitty gritty details of it, but oh did he care about anyone else seeing more of blushy Peter on that bike and in that fucking outfit that he was wearing.

 

His efforts at regaining brain function failed spectacularly as Mary Jane scrolled the photos to sets he hadn’t even hoped in his wettest dreams would have been taken. Peter was hard. Hard and in that stupid fishnet and _blushing_ across his shoulders and down his chest. 

 

Blushing redder than in the other pictures. Sam loved getting that blush from him. It was fucking cute and he could just imagine his face under the mask. Determined and embarrassed most likely, he wondered what had pushed him. He’d been soft or sporting a semi in most of the other pics that caught him from that angle.

 

It had to have been something MJ said. Had to’ve. She knew all his buttons to push. Once he’d calmed down he probably had been so  _ embarrassed _ . Must be why in the actual calendar pic he was hiding the goods. 

 

Oh, but oh whatever had been said had started him on one of his rants. He was gesturing and posturing and, “Hnngggh.”

 

“What was that, Sam?” MJ teased.

 

Peter was deliberately posing completely shamelessly now. Still lecturing too. Sam’s tongue felt thick, his mouth dry. Some kind of response was definitely required. “What set him off on lecture mode?”

 

Sam was proud he managed to get out  an entire sentence.

 

Mary Jane giggled, “Oh, you know the questions I asked for the interviews were pretty silly. And you  _ know _ how Peter is.”

 

“Yeah “ Sam said. Boy did he ever know. He was always taunting Peter and pushing his buttons. The nerd got so passionate about whatever he was lecturing on, how could Sam resist?

 

“The questions weren't  _ that  _ crazy,” Sam said after a moment for his brain to process what MJ had actually said. They had been ridiculous, silly questions like for a Cosmo or even Playgirl interview. But nothing really out there. After all, MJ was still MJ, she knew them and their boundaries pretty well. 

 

MJ  _ did  _ know their boundaries pretty well. Sam gave himself a little shake and leveled a look at her. She smiled winsomely back at him.

 

“You set him off on purpose, you sneak,” Sam said. MJ giggled.

 

“You’ll never prove it in court, copper,” She said, feigning a fake gangster accent. Sam snorted.

 

He needed these pics. For completely legitimate reasons that didn’t involve fantasies of his super sexy spider  stud boss seducing him and/or being seduced over that ugly ass spider-cycle. 

“Ms. Watson strikes again!” Sam said, trying to continue the banter. Then added “Uh, this is a lot of pics to go over today. Let’s check over the interview transcript first.”

 

Ah, there it was. No wonder MJ had wanted to do Peter’s interview during his photoshoot.  A completely ‘casual’ question of ‘So, is there a lucky Mrs. Spider-Man or is there hope for your lady fans yet?’

 

MJ had, indeed, set him off on purpose. Not that he could blame her. Peter was most definitely hot as Helfire all riled up like that. Secretly Sam thought MJ had an on/off thing with Peter to help keep New York relatively intact. Because damn did Peter get up to some stupid shit when they were off. Also that ass. 

 

And apparently that D. Casual locker room glimpses had not prepared Sam for how… super… Peter’s dick was when he was hard. 

 

Sam hadn’t really considered himself a size queen before right this moment but damn. 

 

Damn.

 

Must. Resist. Urge. To. Gossip. MJ. Too. Meddlesome. 

 

“Damn,” Sam articulated. Because of course his mouth ran off without checking his brain. One of these days it was gonna get him killed. He decided right then and there that MJ had a plan Sam was now labeling ‘torment Sam with my hot sometimes fuck buddy and how he can’t get none for himself’. 

 

It was cruel. It was typical of his life as of late. 

 

Anyways this time Sam’s torment came from the pics MJ had ‘selected’ to go with this article, which he knew she was straight up trolling him with because full frontal spider-dick would never fly with  _ The Bugle _ .

 

“I know it’s a lot to take,” MJ said. Sounding a serious as a heart attack. 

 

Sam nearly choked on his own spit at her double entendre, or was it even that if she was blatantly baiting him? He managed to get out, “No shit?!” 

 

“You need to tell Peter how bad you’ve got it for him, Sam,” Sam stared at Mary Jane as if she had just sprouted a furry tail and fairy wings. With their life it wasn’t like it wasn’t a non-zero chance of having happened. But then he realized.

 

Oh. That was MJ’s plan. Fuck she would make such a great superhero, or (he spared an internal shudder at the thought of her as a) supervillain. Knock him off his game, and strike while he was down. She was ruthless. One of the best reporters, real reporters not click-bait writers, of their generation. Sam may not like it, but he had learned when a battle wasn’t worth fighting.

 

“Yeah,” Sam acquiesced. His voice squeaked embarrassingly. “Yeah, but first. I need these pics, like right now.”

 

MJ arched a finely plucked eyebrow.

 

“Immediately,” Sam added. 

 

At MJ’s continued stare down he continued, defeated, “Okay, fine I’ll tell Peter how hot he is. And you’re going to owe me so much ice cream and shitty Earth tv shows when he breaks my heart.”

 

Mary Jane nodded. “Okay, sounds good. Tell him by tomorrow’s lunch or I’ll give him your completely secret self insert NovaSpidey fics.”

 

Sam clutched at his chest, miming a betrayal. “You’re  _ flarking  _ evil MJ!”

 

“Only sometimes,” she smirked.


	6. Chapter 6

Of course when he had the very real threat of embarrassing self insert fanfic  _ about _ his crush being  _ shown to _ his crush, he  _ still _ couldn't figure out what to say. He wracked his mind for something he could tell Peter that would hurt him the least when Peter rejected him.

 

He was worrying so much he nearly forgot about game night. His phone alarm going off reminded him. Well. He’d bring it up  _ at  _ game night. Or, maybe after, yeah,  _ after  _ game night. Sam tossed a change of clothes in his bag, then grabbed his helmet. 

 

On the one hand he might have to stop and do some work if he flew. On the other hand it wasn’t like Peter wouldn’t be late to something at his own apartment. As it turned out, he only had to stop one mugging on his way over. Sam didn’t even try the front door. He let himself in through the window, like usual. 

 

Sam checked the apartment for anything out of the ordinary, out of habit beaten(and exploded, and lasered, and drowned) into him. Nothing weirder than Pete’s random nerd junk. He dropped his helmet next to the futon, shrugging to himself. He got the game loaded up on Peter’s console and settled in. 

 

He’d managed to get through the first stage before the power went out.

 

“Flark, really?” Sam groaned. He turned off the controller and dropped it on the coffee table. No sense wasting its battery with the console off. He pulled out his phone and flopped back on the sofa, pulling up FaceBook. One online argument about how realistic Star Trek space ships were, four adorable cat videos, three hilarious Super Hero Fail GIFs of Spider-Man and roughly twenty-four likes later he check the time. Not even five minutes had passed. 

 

“Ugghhhhh, great,” Sam groaned. Judging by his newsfeed Peter was in the middle of stopping crime. He hadn’t called in back up, and honestly it was just the usual stuff so he didn’t need it. But Sam was bored. So, so, so bored. 

 

He stared at his helmet. 

 

His phone got a text.

 

 

[](https://imgur.com/EzfTURz)

 

Oh.

 

_ Flark. _

 

Okay, well. He could do this. He could let Pete know how he felt without MJ sharing his embarrassing fanfiction. Except Peter wasn’t here. He sent Peter a text, reminding him of game night. Just in case. Then replied to MJ with  _ ok ok im on it ):< _

 

He put on his helmet and, once the glowy transformation was complete, pulled out his student’s papers from his bag. Time to be something like the responsible adult he somehow survived to become and grade these. 


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry if you noticed anything hinky with the chaps, technical difficulties on my end. chapters should all be up and in correct order now, also just imagine the eyes emoji in the txt msg to mj because apparently putting it in the chapter breaks it, rip me

Peter came in through the window and was mid mini-rant slash ramble to himself as he got out of his suit. Sam idly wondered the last time the front door had seen use.

 

“Oh fuck! Nononono MJ I’ll tell him I’ll tell him!” Peter hissed to himself. Sam’s interest was piqued. The power was still out, he was grading by the light of his glow as he hovered cross legged next to the coffee table. Peter stumbled out of his suit, typing one handed on his phone.

 

Sam lazily corrected a rambling paragraph.

 

“Don’t send Sam those pics, don’t send Sam those pics MJ, please!”

 

“What pics?” Sam asked, setting his pen down.

 

“Sam!” Peter shrieked and clung to the ceiling.

 

“Dude. I sent you a text about game night,” Sam reminded him.

 

“Oh, hahaha, yeah, game night!” Peter laughed nervously.

 

“So, pics?” Sam prodded. It had to be something really embarrassing if Peter didn’t want MJ to send them.

 

“No!” Peter yelped, “No pics! What pics, I mean, there’s no pics!”

 

“Kay, I’mma text MJ,” Sam agreed, pulling out his phone.

 

“No! Nononono! Sam don’t you dare!”

 

Sam unlocked his phone and pulled up messages.

 

“Nova! Put that down! That’s- that’s an order!”

 

“Shyea right,” Sam blew a raspberry at that. As if.

 

“Augh!,” Peter pulled at his hair. “Okay! Okay fine!”

 

Sam pretended to think about it, then went ahead and sent MJ a text anyways. _what’s up w these pics pete don’t want me 2 see???_

 

Peter tackled Nova onto the floor.

“ _ Flark _ ! Pete what the shit!” Sam barked.

“I think you’re cute!” Pete bellowed.

Sam blinked at him. Peter thought he was cute? His heart flipped into his throat.

“Would you two freaks shut up! Some of us are tryin’ ta sleep!” Peter’s neighbor bellowed at them, banging on the wall. 

“Sorry Mister Johnson!” Peter called out, then much more quietly. “I, uh, might have taken some pics of you. That uh, are kinda… um, creeper-y?”

Sam tilted his head, raising his eyebrow behind his helmet. His phone chimed with a new email.

Peter slumped his shoulders in defeat and sat up. “Please don't be mad at me? Please? It won’t happen again, I’m so, so sorry. I know I’m a creep, I know but it was just, and the lighting, and, and I had my phone and-”

Sam tuned out of Peter’s rambling to look at the pics MJ had sent to him. There were two straight in the email. Or, rather, directly in the email since they were pretty tellingly  _ not straight _ .

“So… Webs,” Sam said slowly. 

“Yeah?” Peter said nervously.

“What you're trying to say is, you wanna kiss me?” Sam gave Peter his most rakish smile. It was a good one, he knew.

Peter buried his face in his hands.

Sam reached up and pulled his hands away, holding them in his own. “Cause you know. Full homo, that sounds hot.”

“Wh-what?” Peter said, Sam thought he looked adorable. He gave Peter’s hands a squeeze. 

“Pretty sure I didn’t stutter,” Sam said lazily, looking up at Peter. This was turning into a much better night than he’d initially feared. Excitement thrilled along his nerves as Peter gazed at him with what was definitely desire.

Peter leaned down and kissed him. It was kind of awkward and sort of unsure. Sam kissed him back and Peter gained confidence. Sam made an encouraging noise at this development.

About the third time Sam’s helmet got in the way he pulled it off. 

A bit after that Sam wound up clinging to Peter's shoulders, his own legs wrapped around his hips. Peter holding him up so effortlessly was hot. It was almost embarrassing how hard he was. Peter was just as hard, and the friction from grinding against him was delicious. 

“Not that I’m not always up for some recreational spider wrestling-” Sam started.

“Always?” Peter leered, sounding and looking way too sexy with his just been kissed lips. 

Sam leered right back and ground his hips deliberately slowly against Peter, “Always. But you kinda reek, dude. Did you get dunked in the Thames?”

“Sam. Sam.  _ Sam _ the Thames is in  _ London _ -”

“Whatever-”

“Sam I know you know this,” Peter pressed, pouting adorably. Sam  _ did  _ know this. Sam  _ also  _ knew Peter looked absolutely adorable when he was trying to explain things. Sam also learned just now that Peter looked even better explaining things after hot makeouts. Sam approved. Sam did not approve of his post super hero-ing stink though.

“Don’t care, shower now.” Sam clarified, pushing against Peter’s chest.

Peter stood up and carried him to his apartment’s tiny bathroom, only one hand braced against his ass. Sam very manfully restrained himself from whining in excitement. He did not restrain his upset yelp when Peter dropped him and hopped in the shower (flinging his suit bottoms at him). By the time he’d scrambled up (and tossed away some truly horrendous smelling suit bottoms) Peter was naked and soapy. 

While it wasn’t the first time Sam had seen Peter in such a state, it  _ was _ the first time he was not only allowed to ogle but basically required by like law or something. Sam ogled. Peter flicked soap at him. Sam threw him a towel. 

“Don’t get the towel wet, Buckethead!” Peter said.

“Don’t get your face wet, Webhead,” Sam retorted. 

Sam shrieked as Peter pounced him, he had only just noticed the water turning off. He had about a moment to grumpily reflect on his conditional powers, but before he could protest out loud Peter started kissing him. Nice. Sam kissed back. Very, very nice. Sam pressed his hands against Peter’s body, enjoying the feel of him under his hands. Firm muscle and soft, just a bit wet skin. This was definitely good. But.

“Not that-” Sam said. Peter tried to kiss him quiet, “this isn’t-” Sam was determined to say his piece, “totally hot-” another hungry kiss on Peter’s part, “cause it  _ is- _ ” Sam got side tracked for a little bit with the kissing. It was nice, really nice. Like yes, good, more please. But the tile was still cold even through his clothes and also, “ _ flark _ your tile. It’s cold and gross, like seriously when was the last time-”

Sam was once again cut off by kisses, this time though Peter picked him up and shoved him against the door frame. Sam might have made some rather needy noises in the back of his throat at this new development. Peter chuckled against his lips.

Sam nipped in retaliation. Peter nipped back. This very quickly devolved into a biting mini-strife over their necks and faces. Sam made sure to show his approval by rocking his hips against Peter as best he could in this new angle. Though since it was Peter holding him up that his leverage was terrible. Sam did not mind this at all and made ‘yes want’ noises in the back of his throat as they continued to kiss.

Peter’s hungry kisses moved from Sam’s lips to his chin to his throat. Sam attempted to return the favor by kissing wherever he could reach. But eventually Peter’s kisses moved low enough he had to settle for needy little moans. Low enough in this case teasing at his collar bone along his shirt’s collar.

“I am-” Sam started to say. Peter resumed kissing his lips, effectively shutting him up again for a few more minutes. But really, being fully dressed while his boyfriend(?!) was naked was  _ the worst _ . Especially while he was being pinned against a door frame by said boyfriend(!?). And while the frotting was pretty hot, it just wasn’t  _ enough _ . Sam needed  _ more _ .

But Peter apparently didn’t. Sam was understandably confused as Peter bit his shoulder came came all over Sam’s pants and shirt. Also understandably hella hard because that bite was just on the delicious side of too much.  Before he could do more than make some kind of questioning sound in the back of his throat, Peter braced Sam against the door frame one armed (oh his back was gonna hate him after this but he really couldn’t bring himself to care) and ripped off his pants. Peter immediately made up for any potential faux paux by taking Sam’s cock in his mouth.

“Fuck!” Sam exposited. 

While Sam was pretty sure Peter was taunting him by trying to talk around his dick, Sam didn’t particularly care as  _ Peter was trying to talk around his dick _ . The vibrations were great and the heat was great and the wetness was great and everything was fucking great.

“Fuck this ‘s great,” Sam explained. He grabbed Peter’s hair and hung on.

Peter hummed something else. Sam responded with a well articulated argument, it went: ‘gluh’. 

Peter then proceeded to fuck him with his mouth. Sam made an incredibly thought out appreciative speech on this development. It went something like ‘fuckfuckfuckohfuckingfuckyes’. And about the third time the head of his cock hit the back of Peter’s throat  _ and kept fucking going _ Sam came so hard he was pretty sure he forgot to breathe.

When his brain came marginally back online Peter was carrying him over his shoulder, nibbling at his hip. Huh. That sure was a thing that was happening he acknowledged to himself. He might have made some mewling little sounds at this, but he definitely would  _ never _ admit to it. Then Peter dropped him on the bed. Sam did yelp in indignation at this, and made loud protest at the cold lube on his rather sensitive bits. 

“Sorry, sorry,” Peter apologized, rubbing his hot fingers against Sam’s hole. Sam grumbled but conceded that this was acceptable. He communicated this with a huffy little ‘s fine’. Then stopped bothering to even pretend to be annoyed as Peter resumed kissing him, nimble fingers working him open.

“I’m going to fuck your brains out,” Peter informed him, grin nearly predatory. 

“No, you,” was Sam’s extremely eloquent rebuttal. Because despite Peter’s quick orgasm his cock was still plenty hard. Hard and lube slick and Sam was definitely stretched and ready. Sam wiggled, just a bit. Ready and  _ empty _ .

“Uh-huh, sure,” Peter agreed, pushing Sam’s legs so that his knees were above his shoulders. Sam took a moment to pat his own back for showing off his flexibility at the photoshoot. Peter  _ had _ been paying attention after all.

“Yesssss,” Sam hissed, Peter finally pushing the head of his cock into him. He was going  _ so slowly _ though. Sam reaffirmed his newfound size queen status to himself by attempting to slam his ass against Pete’s hips. Peter moved his hand from his leg (Sam most definitely did not whine at this) to grip his hips and hold him in place. Sam very definitely whined at  _ this _ .

“Woah there my little lightbulb,” Peter’s voice was husky and strained. Sam continued to make every effort he could to drive his cock deeper into him. It was pretty much useless though as even one handed Peter held his hips still with ease. Sam didn’t think he’d gotten so hard again so fast possibly ever. Peter was gonna  _ kill  _ him with going so slow.

Sam slammed his free leg onto Peter’s shoulder and tried his damndest to get him to  _ move _ . Peter did resume his claiming of Sam. Going even slower than Sam had thought he’d been trying for at first. Fuck. That utter teasing  _ asshole _ . Sam growled as he ‘struggled’ against Peter’s strength.

“I’m not gonna let you hurt yourself, idiot,” Peter told him, sliding oh so slowly into him. Sam made an outraged noise of indignation at that.

“You’re not gonna hurt me!” Sam snapped.

“Uh-huh, and when was the last time you got fucked, again, exactly? I thiiiink I remember you bitching about being single for… aahhh… a while now, hmmm?” Peter lazily responded. Sam had been bitching about just such a problem, in the forlorn hope it’d get Peter to  _ do something about it. _ Sam raged at him.

It was admittedly hard to sound intimidating or command worthy when one third impaled on a dick and trying to get it deeper. Sam gave it his best effort though. Peter laughed. It was warm and fond and did fluttery nice things to Sam’s heart but also he seriously could take him. He’d be fine, and even if he  _ did _ get hurt it wasn’t like he couldn’t toss on his helmet and heal up. He may have attempted to reason with Peter that obviously this was the case. Peter wasn’t having it.

“Mmm, nah, pretty sure you just confessed to being too horny to not hurt yourself, Buckethead,” Peter drawled.

“Fuck you,” Sam cursed. 

“You really are trying your best,” Peter agreed.

Halfway now and Sam was sure of two things. That Peter Parker was a fucking menace and that also he might, maybe, just possibly be right about how lust-stupid Sam was being about it all. Not that that stopped Sam from trying to slam down onto him in one go. If anything having Peter keeping him in place while he writhed under him was even hotter than getting his way. Not that he’d  _ ever _ confess that to him.

“Fuck, this is hot, fuck, fuck, please, okay! Please let me move!” Okay well, maybe Peter wouldn’t assume the super strength ‘trapping’ him was what Sam meant. And maybe this way he’d get what he wants. “Please.”

“What was that, Sam?” Peter’s wicked grin was doing completely unfair things to Sam’s insides. He growled back at him. Peter stopped moving.

“Please! Please Pete, let me move!” Sam repeated. When Peter didn’t immediately let up Sam resorted to curses, “Fuck! Fuck you, let me fuck you!”

“Welllll,” Peter drawled, or attempted to his voice was shaky and low, “If you insist.”

If hard pressed to describe the sound he made taking the rest of his cock in one surprised and (a bit over)enthusiastic thrust Sam might have said he’d moaned. He’d actually wailed in shocked pleasure loud enough to das’t near wake the dead. Peter’s quiet ‘oh fuck’ almost went unheard. 

Peter had let go of Sam’s leg and he took the opportunity to wrap it tight around Peter’s waist, other leg still over his shoulder. 

“Fuck me,” Sam demanded.

“Uhn,” Peter agreed. He moved his hips with smooth instinct, eyes trained on Sam’s face. Sam smirked up at him, before letting his mouth smile much more naturally at the pleasure. Sam did his best to move with Peter’s motions, its was incredibly tempting to just lay there and take it, but it was also fun watching Peter watch him with that ridiculous look of disbelief.

They fucked eagerly, years of emotions held back finding release in this first between them. Sam made noises of appreciation in the back of his throat as Peter came again, hot slick cum filing him up (a much better thing than ruining his clothes). Peter gazed at him with a completely dopey grin, Sam’s own expression was pretty dopey as well though he’d never admit it. Peter slid his still a bit slick hand over Sam’s cock. 

“Fuck,” Sam gasped.

“Mmm, yeah. You can keep movin’ its cool,” Peter said, sounding far more relaxed than Sam had nearly ever heard him. It was a sound Sam could definitely get used to.

Sam moved, fucking himself into Peter’s hand and onto Peter’s dick. Not to say that he couldn’t get used to this either. “Fuck, Webs.”

He leaned down, riding him smoothly, kissed his lips slowly. Peter kissed back and ran his other hand through Sam’s short hair. They kissed and fucked languidly, no more urgency now. Until, it felt like all too soon, Peter sped up his hand around Sam’s cock and Sam shook apart.

It wasn’t until much later, after a rather more fun than cleansing joint shower, that Peter asked Sam, “So, what’d MJ threaten you with?”

“Uh…” 


	8. Etc.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the notification anyone that got excited I added an epilogue. I had originally wanted to make a fake screenshot of what MJ emailed to Sam but it got very complicated compared to my free time. But I did manage to finish the 'sof gay boi' pic I wanted in the screenshot. Tragically no creepery nearly nekkid Sam pic sorry lol. Anyways, it seemed a shame to just leave it sitting on my harddrive so here.

[](https://i.imgur.com/N97X7LX.png?1)


End file.
